


On The Winds of Autumn

by Jacrispea



Category: Far Cry 5
Genre: Enemies to Lovers, Enemy Lovers, Eventual Sex, Explicit Language, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Fluff and Smut, Forbidden Love, I'm Bad At Tagging, Internal Conflict, Night Terrors, Oral Sex, Outdoor Sex, Passion, Project at Eden's Gate, Secret Relationship, Sex, Sexual Tension, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-08
Updated: 2019-10-16
Packaged: 2020-11-27 06:16:31
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 19
Words: 15,316
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20943689
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jacrispea/pseuds/Jacrispea
Summary: Everything was taken from you: your home, your family and your freedom. Along with Eli and the Militia, you fight for what was yours.Until you meet Jacob and feel a pull like nothing you have ever felt before. You both fight against it, but sometimes fate is stronger than reason.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This story is for Scarlett, who has given me the best and most honest feedback since day one. 
> 
> Our love for Jacob knows no end ❤️ Hope this story lives up to your vision for it.

As your boots crunched atop the last of the fallen crisped leaves of autumn, you made your way through the forests of the Whitetail Mountains. Of course, there was no true agenda, other than to dethrone the wolves that had moved into your territory years ago. 

These were your woods long before the Seeds arrived. 

Eli remembered. The militia remembered too. So it was only natural for you to find your place with them, fighting at their side for your home. 

Today there was something new in the air - a chill and the lingering scent of death that hadn't been there yesterday. But more than that, an uneasy feeling hung heavy. You could sense someone, though every sweep you did came back empty. 

There were no peggies patrolling today. No Judges and no Chosen. It was as if the Project had chosen to lay low on purpose. 

You huffed and sat down on the cold ground, resting your back to the tall pine behind you. All you wanted to do was go home and lay in your warm bed, under the thick woolen blankets but you knew Eli would be disappointed if you were to slack off on your duties. 

Still, a break would be okay, you reasoned. You stared off, watching a few last leaves dance to the ground in the distance. Memorized, you let your mind relax and take you to another place.

That's when you sensed it again. The same feeling you had earlier. 

Quickly, you jumped to your feet and swung around with your rifle held to your cheek. 

"Whoa, pup," he rasped as he stepped out of the brush and into your clearing. "You know how to fire that?"

Your heart pounded when you recognized the jacket and the shock of red hair. He had never been close enough for you to see up close but you had seen the posters and knew his face immediately. 

"I'd suggest you stay still," you snapped back and held the gun steady. Your posture extended to one of confidence. You were far too stubborn to show fear, especially to him. 

"Promises," he said just above a whisper. "Tell me, are you the one causing all the problems out here? I'm growing tired of replacing my beacons."

"I have no idea what you're talking about," you lied. You knew how dangerous he was and even though he was calm now, he was a soldier and trained as such. You knew his mind would be playing mental chess, preparing his next move if he knew the truth. 

"Not buddies with Eli then, hmm?" he asked. 

"No. I'm just trying to survive out here. I don't want trouble and I'm sure you'd say the same."

Jacob stood motionless and calm, looking you over with curiosity. Your reaction was not one he expected. When most people would run or drop to their knees before him, you stubbornly held your ground. He could of course have his Judges here in seconds with the sound of a whistle but you were too much of an anomaly to waste. Something about you stirred a feeling in Jacob he couldn't place. 

"You're not like the others," he commented. 

"Neither are you," you told him and dropped the rifle to your side, even though everything in your body screamed for you to fire. 

You both gazed at one another quietly, taking in every detail and setting it to memory. 

"Go home," Jacob told you finally. "It's not safe in these woods."

Without another word, he turned and retreated to the trees, painfully aware of who you were and who you fought for, but deciding to let you think he bought into your lie.


	2. Chapter 2

"Found a few more for you," you announced as you dropped a crate of records in front of Wheaty. 

"Amazing! I don't know how you find them but I'll start spinning them right away. Thanks."

"Don't mention it. I'll keep an eye out for more. I'm tired of hearing that same Peggie gospel bullshit all day over my radio."

"Ditto," he agreed. "Eli was looking for you earlier by the way. I think he's still around."

"K, I'll go find him," you said and patted a hand on the table in front of him. "See ya."

He nodded and smiled brightly at you as you turned to search for Eli. No doubt, he'd be at the control panel in the bunker, watching the various monitors he had set up. 

"Always the predictable one," you chuckled when you found him. "Heard you were looking for me?"

"Things are turning for us. They're getting grim," he told you. "I've sent out patrols but no one's seen a thing."

"Me neither," you lied. "It's been calm."

"And yet our people are disappearing. These damn Judges... they're making them faster than we can kill 'em off."

"I took out that beacon you asked me to the other day."

"It's been replaced again," he said, pointing to one of the monitors. "Two more put up with it."

"Fuck," you muttered, looking over the monitors. Sure enough, the beacon was standing tall, as if it had always been. You glanced over to another monitor and saw its twin. 

"Can I send you back out again?" Eli asked. He brushed his long hair from his eyes. 

"Sure thing. I'll go out now."

"Be careful," he called out.

\---

High on the hills above the beacon, you laid flat on your stomach, watching the Chosen below haul away their prize. 

Two wolves circled in the cage, nipping at the bars. The sound of their teeth against the steel rang out loud enough for you to hear, sending a chill through your body. 

The beasts were carelessly thrown to the back of the truck before the two men piled in the front and drove away, leaving you alone with your target. 

Crouching now, you rummaged through your bag and pulled the pin on the grenade you had fished from the bottom. After taking aim, it was sent to the ground below. Sparks and metal rained down to the ground, bringing the beacon down with it. The smoke from the impact billowed into the clear air. You gazed down at it happily, as you removed another grenade, determined to destroy every inch of the beacon this time.

Jacob watched from the mountain above, hidden by the ridge of rocks lining the edge. He should be angry, furious even, but he found himself admiring you and the audacity you had to destroy his property in the daylight. 

The smile that pulled at the corners of your lips had your face younger and carefree. It was a sight he couldn't drag himself away from. 

You were beautiful, yes, but more than that, you were strong. He didn't know how or why but Jacob felt like he may have found something he had been searching for without knowing. 

He would take his time with you, he decided. Track you. Figure you out. But oh, how sweet it would be to condition one of Eli's pets against him.


	3. Chapter 3

You watched the dark cloud of smoke until it extinguished, content that your work hadn't been interrupted. Of course the beacon would return as if by some magic, but you had left it in ashes, prolonging the rebuild for now. 

Sweeping the area and satisfied that you were alone, you took off for the next location Eli had mapped out for you. Stealth was key, you knew, as you would be crossing a lot of territory on your journey. Unfortunately for you, you weren't the best at concealing your movements and too stubborn to hide when confronted. Still, you quieted your steps the best you could and searched the area continuously as you moved, always seeking the shelter of the overgrown trees that littered the forest floor. 

Time pulled along slowly but after an hour, you could see the red flashing light of the beacon. Without thinking, you jogged the rest of the way until you were a short distance away, still concealed. No one was around, not even the wolves.

You beamed to yourself, knowing you could make short work of the target. 

"Ah, ah, ah... that doesn't belong to you," Jacob hummed from behind you. You froze, never daring to turn. 

A few light steps echoed and then a warm breath tickled at your ear. His aura radiated from him, demanding you stay still. Everything was silent - his breaths, his movements. He was a ghost in these woods and they were his. 

"How long have you been following me, Red?" you asked, forcing confidence into your voice. 

"Long enough," he breathed. Again, the pull of his energy touched at your back. It took every ounce of energy to not turn to him. 

"You could have stopped me," you pointed out, referring to the last beacon. 

"Could have." Jacob knew he could have taken you out quickly more than a few times but as often as his thoughts turned to you over the past few days, it was something he wouldn't allow himself to do.

The pull was too strong now. Your need to see him, to watch the subtle changes in his stoic expression, was too much. You turned slowly, only a foot from him and tilted your face to his. Your kept eye contact, even when it became uncomfortable. 

Jacob gazed down at the light in your eyes, intrigued by the woman who refused to back down. He took in all the small details he hadn't seen earlier - the curve of your lips, the crinkle at the edge of your eyes and the wisps of hair that fell over them. His breath caught in his throat as he fought himself to keep his hand from reaching out and brushing them back.

"You need to move more quietly. I could teach you."

You laughed, not able to believe he would say such a thing after you destroyed his property. When you composed yourself again, you looked at him for annoyance but his expression remained calm. 

It was strange to you that a man who had been through so much - yes, you had read the Book of Joseph but only for curiosity's sale - could be so in control of himself. It would come as no surprise if he had the same unkept rage as his youngest sibling, but no one ever spoke of that. He was terrifying for a completely different reason. 

"I'm sure you've pieced it together, maybe you already knew, but I don't think that would go over well with my friends," you told him. "Just do what you have to, alright? Put a bullet in my head if that's what you're going to do."

Jacob chuckled quickly and gazed down at you, "I'm not here to take your life. I want you to fight for the right side."

"Oh? I'm sure this is surprising but I refuse to give in to whatever you do in that chair of yours. It'll be less frustrating for us both if you just end it now."

"I want you, but only when you come to me on your own," he said above a whisper. 

When the words escaped, a realization hit him that he meant them in two very different ways. It was the first time he realized his attraction was more than strategic. He wanted you in every possible way, even though you were still a mystery to him. 

"Keep waiting," you shot back at him, shaken by his words. As ashamed as you were, they had stirred something - a yearning even - in you. 

You reached out and patted a hand over his chest once before leaving but he grabbed it before you could pull away. He wasn't rough in any way but his grasp was firm. 

The feeling of skin on skin, stopped you both. Wordless, all you could do was look to him as his eyes almost pleaded with you silently for something you were unsure of. As soon as it came into his eyes, it left again. 

"Say hello to Eli for me," he purred.


	4. Chapter 4

It had been four days since your encounter with Jacob. You were so shaken from the feelings that stirred inside of you, that you stayed close to home, telling the Whitetails you were ill when they called. 

Your thoughts were not your own any longer; they belonged to Jacob. Even at night, they turned to him. 

Tonight, you had just woken from a dream - he was behind you again, whispering into your ear. His lips brushed against the skin, sending the same delicious shiver through you that you had felt from the other day. 

When you woke, you swore you felt his presence again but you were alone. 

The next morning, you woke with the same longing you felt when you woke through the night. 

"What are you doing?" you asked yourself, ashamed at what you were contemplating. 

You beat yourself up mentally while you showered and dressed but even with that, you still found yourself heading out on foot to a place that should be forbidden. 

\---

"No one's seen her before, sir," one of Jacob's Chosen reported back on the mysterious woman they spotted in the woods just outside the Veterans Center.

"Where is she now?" Jacob asked calmly, trying to hide his excitement. He knew it was you even without seeing you. 

"I'll get a location and head out to take care of it."

"No, I'll go. I need you elsewhere," Jacob told him. "Just tell me where she is."

\---

Jacob watched from a safe distance as you fluttered through the trees quickly, darting below the branches and leaping over obstacles in your path. Your movements were much quieter today but he was still able to hear you from far away and tracked you easily. 

Your eyes fixed on the large birds ahead of you, too stupid to flee. The winters were hard in Hope County and supplies were scarce. In the fall, you did your hunting, stocking up for winter. Today, your path just happened to veer closer to the forbidden mansion nestled away in the mountains, than it normally would. You told yourself over and over that it was just another hunting trip but couldn't deny the disappointment you felt when you found yourself alone in the woods. 

As you neared your prey, you crouched and silenced your movements for a long moment before you pulled an arrow to your bow string and dropped the first turkey easily - the arrow piercing through its eye with ease. Quickly, you dropped the second.

Jacob watched admiringly at your skills. The arrows left your hands like they were an extension of your body and they did so without you taking much aim. You were skilled, just as he had knew you would be. 

"Red, you going to come out and say hello?" you called out into the woods. 

Eerily, the same feeling swept over you when you stood from your hiding spot. You couldn't explain it - it wasn't rational - but you _felt_ him. 

Jacob stood motionless, confident there was no way you could know his whereabouts. He debated whether to stay hidden but something in him pushed him forward, out into the clearing. You turned to him when he emerged, with the warmest of expressions. 

"Here I was starting to think you were ignoring me," you called over to him as you scooped the turkeys up, ripping the arrows from their carcasses and tosses them into your bag. "Following me again, are we?"

"You're knocking at my door. How could I not answer?" Jacob asked, stepping towards you. 

You turned to him instinctively, watching the way he stalked towards you. His posture was the same casual one he always held but his eyes were fire, baring into yours while he closed in. You stood your ground even as he neared and placed his hands on either side of your head, resting them to the tree behind you, pinning you in the process. He bent down, inches from your face. You felt his breath on your skin and smelt him for the first time. He smelt of the forest and something else you couldn't place - something wild. 

"You're in my woods. I've given you your freedom, even so, but now you mock me by paying me this little visit. Tell me, sweetheart, what is it you want from me?" he asked. He kept his eyes on yours, trying to calm his pulse as he listened to your breathing and watched the wind stroke through your hair. 

"You act confident, Red... but you're not. You're like me, I can sense it; broken, hollow. You present confidence in hopes that others won't see the truth: that you're not in control of anything, not even your own emotions. All the pieces you held together loosely before, have now fallen apart and all you can do is wear this mask."

Jacob could only stare. He felt a sting, knowing your words were true. But how could someone he barely knew, know him so well when even his family didn't know the truth? In that moment, the emotions he pushed down to the darkest pit in his mind stirred. It took everything he had to control himself. 

"Do you know the interesting thing about alpha wolves?" he asked, changing the subject. 

"Enlighten me," you said, still inches from his face. 

"Alphas will find one another, as if by some means of fate. They may not know one another but there's an attraction, a yearning, that neither can deny," he explained, still close. "The others in the pack allow them to be the only ones to mate and they do so for life, unable to escape the bond between them."

He silenced himself, waiting for your answer. 

"You... feel it, don't you?" you asked him softly. 

"Yes."

"I can sense you before I can even see you. How is that possible?" you asked again. 

Jacob's fingers twitched at his side, wanting to hold your face in his hands finally, but unable to allow himself to. You were the enemy afterall and this was war. Until you gave yourself to him and abandoned your cause, it would always be this way. 

"You know why," he rasped. 

The blood in your veins was set on fire again as you felt the closeness between you. Your breaths entwined in one another's in the space between you, reminding you of just how close he was. 

"I won't leave them," you told him. 

"I know," he said, knowing it was the truth. How could he expect you to leave your family when he wouldn't abandon his? 

Jacob pushed up from the tree finally, feeling the ease of tension between you. "I let you get close this time but if you come to my door again, I can't let my people see you given mercy again."

"Don't make me wait so long next time then," you called out as he turned and headed back the way he came. You watched the casual sway in his steps and felt yourself wanting to run to him. 

This wasn't good. Not at all.


	5. Chapter 5

"Delivery!" you called out as you entered the bunker. It had been a week since you went to the Wolf's Den and had seen your friends and judging by their anxious radio calls, they were missing you. 

But you had chosen to stay at home, ashamed of your new found emotions and paranoid they would find out somehow, though it was of course, impossible. Most of the Whitetails lived in the bunker full time but you chose a tiny bit of freedom when you discovered the run down cabin nestled in the woods. You watched it daily for a month to ensure it was abandoned and then quickly fixed it up and moved in, making it your own. 

"Whatcha got for us?" Tammy asked when you met her in the hall. "How are you anyway, darlin'?"

"Much better, thanks. I managed to get out hunting yesterday and grabbed you guys a turkey. Should be big enough to feed everyone for a meal."

"You're a gem," she said happily, taking the cleaned turkey which you had wrapped carefully to avoid spoilage. "I'll run this to the fridge."

"You ever going to teach me your mysterious ways?" a voice came from behind you. 

"Nope, you're too young to be hunting Wheaty," you teased as you turned to him. 

"That one's not getting old or anything," he said, rolling his eyes. 

You laughed, "You're welcome to join me whenever. Though I may not be the best teacher. Apparently I'm heavy on my feet."

You froze, knowing you had let a detail slip that you shouldn't have, already. Of course, you mind went to Jacob again - as if you needed the reminder. 

"Says who? You're quiet as shit when we're out."

"I can't even remember. Probably just some smart ass," you said quickly. "What's going on around here anyway?"

"Same old. Eli's thinking of sending out a few people soon to try to take back the Ranger station though!" he said excitedly. 

"Oh! He's been talking about that for awhile... I should go talk to him but I'll be back. Cards later, maybe?"

"You got it!" he called back as you hurried down the hall. 

You made your way through the dismay corridors of the bunker until you arrived at the room you knew Eli would be in. When you entered, he didn't look up or respond. 

"Hey boss, you doing alright?" 

"Oh, yeah, doing well. Sorry my friend, just thinking," he apologized, finally looking up from the monitor he had been staring at. 

"Eli... there's nothing there..."

He chuckled slightly and straightened to give you his full attention. "Just thinking. Where have you been?"

You made eye contact with him in hopes it would sell your lie. Of everyone here, you felt worse about lying to him. Eli had been a good friend to you for years. 

"Stomach bug or something," you said quickly, wanting to change the subject. "Wheaty said you're going to hit up the peggies. Need help?"

"Would love it. I'm sending in Matthew and Nigel, maybe a few others. I'd like to debrief everyone today and have the plan in motion for tomorrow. Sound good?" 

"Perfect. I'll gather the troops."

"Thanks, and glad you're back. It's been a bit of a bore without your incessant teasing," he smiled and turned back to the monitors. 

"Ass," you muttered. Behind you, Eli laughed. 

\---

Jacob sat, leaned back in the chair behind his desk, listening to his Chosen stumble over their words. They had just informed him of an attack in the Ranger station - which had been his property now for well over a year. 

"How many?" he asked calmly, wondering if any of his people survived. 

"All of them, sir," his guard informed him. Jacob marvelled at the fact that this idiot couldn't make eye contact while addressing him. 

"Weak," Jacob hummed. "Who was it? Whitetails?"

The two Chosen glanced at one another before speaking, "Not sure. We recognized one of them as Eli's but the other two..."

"What did they look like?" Jacob interrupted, growing impatient but holding his composure. 

"A man in his early twenties maybe - tall, lanky and blonde. He had a rifle with him. An AR-C."

"The other?" Jacob asked. 

"A woman... she wore a hooded hunting jacket and worn down boots but we couldn't see her face. Quick. She wasn't like the others. She carried a bow."

Jacob perked up at the description, knowing full well who the mystery assailant was. A smile crept to his face as he stroked his beard and leaned further back in his chair, now kicking up his heels. 

"She's a strong willed one," he said quietly. 

"Do you... know her?" the other guard asked, speaking for the first time. 

"Just one of Eli's," Jacob explained. "Leave me. I have to think this through."

He watched his guards leave and close the door behind them. When he was alone, Jacob stood and paced the floors of his office, studying the map on the far wall. He knew every inch of these mountains. Every landmark, every outpost and every cabin. 

As he mentally crossed off locations on the map, the corner of his mouth turned upwards. 

"There's my girl," he rasped as he placed a palm to the section of the map with the densest forest. A place no one would find unless they were looking. 

He dropped his hand and pulled his jacket on again, setting out for a long awaited visit.


	6. Chapter 6

"You fucking brilliant woman!" Tammy cheered. "I'd love to see that bastard Jacob's face when he knows his station was taken back!"

"Good job," Eli agreed. "All of you. This is a massive win for the good guys."

You beamed as everyone congratulated you and your two friends, who had just gotten back from your mission.

Surprisingly, the station was guarded by only a half dozen guards. Two had escaped but the others were taken out easily. You were the one to radio back to base to the elated voice of Eli. He was always calm, patient - a true leader, but when your call came through, he was unable to hide his excitement. His praise rang through your ears which welcomed every word. 

"How many of us were there when you left?" Tammy asked. 

You glanced at Nigel, your partner in the mission, for an answer. He quickly confirmed six Whitetails were on site and he had received word more were on the way. 

"Excellent. We should celebrate!" Eli announced. "Nice meal and maybe even crack open a couple bottles of that good whiskey in the store room."

Everyone agreed to the idea and funneled down the hall towards the kitchen. 

"I think I'm just going to head home if that's okay?" you announced once everyone was gone and you and Eli were alone. 

"You sure? None of this would have been possible without you."

"Yeah, I think I'd just like to soak in the tub and settle down for the day," you explained. Your emotions were a rollercoaster today; happy at the victory you were a part of but then there was a nagging feeling that you had done something to hurt Jacob. You knew you shouldn't care but the feeling refused to leave you. 

"Are you doing okay? You haven't been yourself lately," Eli asked. The concern in his eyes was evident. 

You pushed into his arms, even though the affection was uncharacteristic of you. His hands held firm in the air around you but finally came around to your back. He pulled you close to him and let you nestle your head against his chest. 

"You're my family, Eli. I'm grateful for you. I know I don't say it enough."

"Same," he agreed, patting a hand on your back. 

You pulled back and gave him a small smile - the best you could force - and waved goodbye as you headed home to be alone. 

\---

You took your time driving home, watching the change of the seasons in the leaves. Montana was a beautiful state, but adorned with the vibrant reds and golds of autumn, it was truly something to be seen. 

You parked your car at the foot of the hill leading to your cabin. At first, it came as an inconvenience but not having a driveway now served its purpose in concealing your home from prying eyes. Your privacy, of course, was always well enjoyed. 

The walk to the cabin wasn't too long and soon you were approaching the overhang of the familiar trees that lined your yard. Their branches hung low and swayed in the breeze, waving to you as their way of welcoming you home. 

You were so wrapped up in the scenery that you didn't see him at first - long legs stretched out from the chair on your deck and hands crossed over his broad chest. He didn't straighten when you approached but kept his eyes on you. 

"I'd ask how you found me, but I can only guess," you said sarcastically.

"I know every inch of these woods. They _are_ mine afterall."

"And mine," you shot back definately. 

"Hmm, we'll see," he hummed, still sitting on your deck casually as if it were something he did regularly. 

"What do you want?" you snapped. You didn't have the patience for this game today.

"Temper... I would think you'd be rejoicing after you killed my people and stole my property."

"I'm so fucking tired of _your_ people and _your_ property. All of this was ours before you and your family took it from us," you said angrily. You took a breath and sighed. "Why are you here, Jacob?"

He was caught off guard, hearing his name tumble from your lips for the first time, rather than the nickname you had bestowed upon him until this point. A pain of empathy pulled at him, knowing what you said was true. He had argued with Joseph on all of this in the past, knowing he was pushing things too far, but ultimately he was family and Jacob couldn't go against that. 

"I needed to see you," he told you, perhaps in his most honest and human moment you had seen of him. 

You stared back at him as he stood and closed the distance between you. You stayed still even when he pushed into your space. 

"I need to let go of this frustration I feel constantly," you admitted to him. 

"You want me to help?" he asked. When you nodded, he felt his cock twitch in anticipation to the answer of his next question. "Tell me what you need."

You stepped closer, tilting your face up to his, mere inches from his face. "Come inside."


	7. Chapter 7

_"Maybe I should let her go,  
But only when she loves me._

_How can I just let her go?  
Not until she loves me"_

_____________

Jacob followed you wordlessly into the cabin, leaving everything else in the world behind. Neither of you touched or spoke as he entered but when the door was shut, he couldn't hold back any longer.

How long it had been since he first saw you behind closed eyes. His thoughts were yours completely now; your lips, your eyes that shone like pools of brilliant light, your strength and the way you didn't fear him like everyone else did. You saw past this exterior; he was confident of that. If only you would give in and come to the Project and his family, he would let you in and show you everything he had hidden away for so long. 

Jacob reached to you, wanting to gauge each reaction you had to his touch. His fingers traced your cheekbone and down your jaw. When he questioned whether you would pull back, you placed a hand over his and left it there, gazing up at him with those conflictes eyes. 

"I've driven myself crazy these past few weeks. How can I escape you?"

Jacob chuckled lightly, knowing the feeling all too well. "You want to?"

"I have to."

Jacob sighed and dropped his hand, defeated. He knew he could have you and your loyalty easily, but it would of course come at the cost of your freedom. His methods now were strange to him and exhausting, but he hoped they weren't in vain. 

"Then tell me pup, what is it you want? You want to push me away but here I am in your home."

"All I want in this moment is for you to fuck me. Nothing more. It can't be," you told him, keeping eye contact. You smiled when you noticed him taking a deep breath and letting his lips part slightly. 

"Then that's what it'll be," he growled and picked you up quicker than you thought any human could move. 

Jacob carried you to the bed in the one room of your cabin and threw you to the bed, dropping down on top of you. He settled between your legs and let his hands linger over your breasts before he replaced them with his mouth, kissing you through the fabric of your shirt. 

Above him, you sighed at the contact between you but knew it wouldn't be enough. You pushed him up until he was kneeling and sat up - legs still stretched on either side of his - to peel off his jacket. When your fingers danced at the hem of his t-shirt, he stiffened up, uncomfortable at letting you see him so vulnerable. The war had left him with more scars and burns than he could count and the bliss he experimented with had left him covered with rashes. 

Your pupils lifted to his when he froze, wondering if he was regretting his choice already. But he didn't push away. When he didn't speak or ease, you continued and pulled his shirt up and over his head. You glanced down at his chest, taking in his physique and the marks on his skin. Each one told a horrible story; you were confident of that. It pained you to know he had been through so much. He was a man of loyalty and purpose but also kind and protective. He didn't deserve such pain. 

You let your fingers touch slightly against his skin as he watched you, still painfully stiff below your touch. 

"Jacob, you're perfect," you told him truthfully, grazing down his stomach. "Just as I imagined."

Jacob watched you for a hint of dishonesty but he found none. When you brought your eyes back from his body and up to his face, he felt something crack within him and a genuine smile crossed his face. He wanted so badly to kiss you but you had set the boundary. 

This was sex and nothing more. 

"C'mere," he instructed, letting his fingers roam up the front of your shirt. When they hit the padded fabric of your bra, he let out a disappointed hum and snapped the clasp at the back easily. "Lift for me."

You did as he asked and raised your arms, letting him peel off your clothes until you were naked from the waist up. His eyes widened as he skimmed over your body. Instantly he felt his cock move against his pants, straining for release. 

"You're so beautiful," he breathed and pushed you back to the bed, removing your pants and the rest of your clothes until you were bare and vulnerable to him. Jacob let out a low moan of appreciation, feeling the anticipation build. 

You watched as he threw his pants and boxers to the floor, kicking his boots off in the process. When he straightened up finally, you gasped at the sight of him. Jacob chuckled and let his fingers wrap around his cock, tugging briefly. 

"I'll be gentle," he assured you, recognizing the nervous look you now held on your face. 

His hand dropped and moved between your legs instead, as he slid a finger inside of you easily and drummed at your clit with his thumb. You leaned back, pressing your head against the pillows as a moan escaped your lips. Jacob grinned, thinking it was by far the most beautiful sound he had ever heard. 

"Enough. Just fuck me..." you whispered. "Please."

"Mmm, is that what you want?" he asked, still pleasuring you. He slid a second finger in to join the first when he knew you were ready and let them swirl against your walls as he thrust them in and out. 

"Please," you pleaded again. 

He smiled and removed his hand, watching your body involuntarily pull towards his hand as he left you. Lowering again to you, Jacob ran his hand up your thigh, pulling it up and around him as he eased his cock into you. You both gasped at the feeling, looking into one another's eyes. 

"You okay?" Jacob asked. 

"Yes," you sighed.

Jacob felt his pulse quicken with every sweet sound you made. It was assuring to him; all he wanted to do as please you, but the signals to were sending were only through body language. He was so used to the Project fangirls he fucked occasionally who were nothing but theatrics and dirty talk. But you... you spoke to him silently. Your body did the talking for you, which he was more than okay with. 

You watched Jacob carefully as your hips rocked together, bringing each other closer with every motion. He was quiet except for a few groans but when you felt yourself start to clamp down around him, he moaned loudly and sank down to bring his mouth over your neck, kissing it roughly. 

"Cum for me," he rasped against the skin he was now letting his teeth sink into. When you tried to raise up from the bed to meet him and close the distance between your chests, he pushed you back and held firmly to your wrist, pushing it above you to the headboard. 

He was rough but you knew he was holding back, and the sentiment of that alone drove you crazy. How could someone so mentally unstable and violent be so in control? He was such a mystery; with layers you had yet to unveil. 

Jacob felt you tense beneath him and the the wetness that followed. It was enough to bring him over the edge, letting him spill into you as his body spasmed with waves of pleasure. Absently, he lifted to kiss you as he came but was met with your cheek when you pulled him to you and wrapped every limb around him, holding him close as he came. 

"Fuck," he groaned as the high finally became to fade. He pulled from you and rolled to bed, still watching you as you began smiling. "I needed that."

"Me too," you agreed from his side. Neither of you touched but you made eye contact, just as you had while you were wrapped up in one another. 

"I don't even know your name."

"It's (y/n)," you told him, not realizing until this point that he didn't even know that much. You felt so connected to him that sometimes you assumed he knew everything about you, but it was the exact opposite. "I'm sorry... I feel like I've known you for so long sometimes."

"Mmm," Jacob agreed, starting to dress. "Look, I know you won't cave but I have to throw it out there. If you're ever in trouble, you know where to find me."

"Even if I don't leave the Whitetails?" 

"As much as it fucking kills me... yes."

"Your Chosen would never let me get close enough to you to call for help," you chuckled, picturing yourself knocking on the heavy doors of the Vet Center. 

"You're off limits. They know that," he said flatly. It surprised you to hear as much. 

Jacob stood, pulling up his jeans and throwing on his thigh holster again. He quickly finished dressing and headed to the front door. Before he turned the knob, he glanced back at you with a wink. "Drop by. Maybe I'll let you get naked in one of my cages."

You smiled back at him deviously, "Only if you keep me."

The words were out before you realized who you were talking to and a pain of regret stung at you immediately. You watched as Jacob raised his eyebrows but then his expression grew dark. 

"Darlin', if I had that chance, I'd never let you go."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *The opening are lyrics from the song Killpop. It's funny how music can give such inspiration to unrelated stories sometimes.


	8. Chapter 8

"I saw him leave the cabin," Wheaty told the others. 

Tammy and Eli gave each other a grave look, knowing what this would mean if it were true. 

"He's threatened her. Something has happened. She hasn't been herself lately," Eli protested. "What were you doing up there anyhow?"

"I just felt bad that she hunted for us and she wasn't even around to enjoy it. Thought I'd run some left overs up to her."

Eli sighed and paced away from the others. He held his fingers to the bridge of his nose, tapping them as he tried to figure out an explanation. 

"Was she with him?" he asked, still looking for answers. 

"Eli, fuck... the girl's obviously in over her head. Wheaty knows what he saw," Tammy snapped at him. 

"Wheaty..." Eli said, ignoring the angry woman to his right. "Was she with him?"

The young man stopped and thought that through for a minute before he shook his head, "Just him. He walked out and closed the door behind him."

"We don't even know if she was home then," Eli said in relief. He felt himself ease a bit, knowing things couldn't be as they appeared. You had been with his family for years, never wavering in loyalty. Whatever he asked of you, you did and he was always grateful for that. 

"Her car was there..."

"Eli, open your damn eyes," Tammy snapped. "Girl's gone rogue. She'll turn us all in if she's in deep with the Seeds."

He dropped his head to his chest, running a hand over his disheveled hair, unsure what to do. He wanted so desperately to disprove their theory. 

"We set something up; a lie, to see if she tells him. If she does, then... well, then we know."

\---

You woke the next day, with your hand on the mattress next to you, feeling for another body. When nothing but the soft fabric of the sheets grazed your hand, your eyes fluttered open. It was only when you noticed the emptiness of the room that you remembered Jacob hadn't stayed. 

It stung a bit when he first started dressing, and rejection poked at you but you talked yourself down. You reminded yourself of the words you had told him. 

_"Nothing more. It can't be."_

You cursed under your breath and forced yourself from the bed, grabbing some instant coffee and chugging it down. You had slept beautifully through the night but were still feeling exhausted. 

A quick shower helped slightly but even when you dressed, you basically had to force yourself to finish. You had made a mistake; you were sure of it now. But now that you had given into lust, it was all that mattered. Your yearning for Jacob was consuming. 

You wondered if you could give in again without being pulled in further. 

\---

Jacob stood on the balcony of his office on the top floor for the Veteran's Centers for most of the night, unable to sleep. It wasn't the dreams that kept him awake, no - not this time; it was the weakness he felt after he left you and made his way home. 

He fought with himself to not turn back. He fought with himself to forget you. You were his weakness, he was never more sure of anything in his life. It was that weakness, he knew, that would either bring him to life or be his demise. He just wasn't sure which yet.


	9. Chapter 9

You knew it was a bad idea - the implications could be deadly - but your body moved on its own now. Your hands were not your own as they snapped the neck of the driver to the prison van you had shot down. 

The two men in the back of the van were thankful, encouraging you to follow them to a nearby hideout but you knew you couldn't flee. You had to wait here; it was the whole reason for your actions afterall. 

Now, alone and vulnerable, you pretended to mend the bent rim on the driver's side. 

The time dragged on slowly and painfully. So when you finally felt the sting of their arrows in your thigh and watched the world cloud and swirl around you, it was a relief. 

\--- 

"Where is she?" Jacob asked worriedly when his Chosen had interrupted his nap to let him know a prisoner had been brought back to the Center. They were unsure if it was you - only going from the description Jacob had given them - but couldn't take the chance in letting you go just in case it wasn't. 

"Out back," one told him as Jacob stormed by, heading for the staircase.

He felt anger that you may have been hurt but his soldiers were just doing their job, he reminded himself. Still, if there was one hair out of place when he got to you, he would have someone hung for it. 

When he got outside to the cages that lined the yard, he saw you laying motionless in the back. Even from here, he knew it was you. He hurried along as quickly as he could while still appearing casual in front of his guards and peered between the bars as you stirred in your bliss induced sleep. 

He dropped down to his knees slowly, deciding to wake you, "(y/n)"

You turned to his direction, eyes opening slowly. Stunned when you smiled up at him, Jacob remained silent. 

"Hey Red," you greeted weakly, unable to pull yourself up from the ground just yet. The world was returning to you but the lines of your reality bent slightly, reminding you of the beautiful dreams you had just been immersed in. 

Jacob studied you, laying so helpless before him but yet still so strong. Even as the bliss held fast, you fought against it to keep your identity. 

"Oh darlin, what have you done?" he sighed. "You're smarter than this."

"You'll want to talk to your soldiers. It took them nearly a half hour to track me," you told him, finally pulling yourself up off the ground. You knelt next to him, holding onto the bars to steady yourself. 

Jacob's eyes shot wide, realizing you were not here by accident. The same feeling he had been having for weeks now, crept between his thighs; he knew all too well what this would mean for him. He grabbed the cage, just above your hands and leaned in, "All you had to do was ask."

"You haven't been around. How else is a girl supposed to get your attention? Not like I can just pick up the phone."

"How the hell am I supposed to explain you? This..." he waved his hand between you. 

"Don't. You don't owe anyone an explanation. They'll follow you regardless."

"This will show as weakness. I can't allow that. I should be stringing you up by your feet at roadside for the crows to eat, not.." Jacob lowered his voice. "Fucking you."

You pondered that but knew he was right. You had gone into this so impulsively and selfishly that you didn't think of the consequences for either of you. Now you felt guilt at the knowledge that his position could be compromised. 

"I'm sorry."

Jacob stared at you for a minute before he pushed to his feet and left without another word. As he approached one of his Chosen, he stopped in front of them and pointed in your direction. "That one. Bring her upstairs to the training room. She's one of the Whitetails."


	10. Chapter 10

"Bind her," Jacob ordered from the corner. He paced casually as you were brought to the chair in the middle of a small room. The only other furniture was a desk in the back and a projector behind where they were setting you down. 

Your wrists were bound to the arms of the chair with heavy steel cuffs but your feet were left as is. 

"Leave us," Jacob muttered as he turned, his eyes piercing into you. The Chosen left quickly, closing the door behind them.

You watched Jacob, unsure if he was playing a part or had finally had enough of you and this game you had been playing for almost a month now. His posture was calm as always, his face stoic and emotionless but you knew - even before you noticed the bulge in his jeans - you knew he was still yours. 

He leaned down to you, hands on each arm as he spoke, "You need to decide, little pup, what it is you want. Either you give yourself to me fully or we end this."

"You know I can't turn on them, Jacob. I wou..."

"I'm not asking that," he interrupted. "We both know we're destined to die here. We're each a tool; a purpose for something far greater. But until we come to that point where one of us has to turn on the other... you need to make a choice." 

You looked back at him in desperation, knowing he was right. He was Joseph's hand in this war and you were Eli's. But for a minute, you could maybe just be human beings. He was offering you the option.

"Then, I'm yours," you said softly. 

Jacob let out the breath he hadn't realized he was holding and wrapped his fingers through your hair, pulling your face to his as he found your lips. He moaned softly when you pushed to him, kissing him hard. 

Everything for the past month had led to this; this one moment in time where you both forgot what life was really like and focused only on the bond between you. Even the night you had shared last week was nowhere near as perfect as this. His lips were the only thing you needed. 

"Dammit," Jacob muttered when he pulled back and realized you were still cuffed. He fumbled in his pocket and pulled out the key, unlocking you quickly and letting you rise from your seat and into his arms.

"Will they come back?" you asked between heavy breaths as you each pulled at the others clothing, dropping articles to the floor and tossing others. 

"No," he assured you as he started pushing you to the desk at the back of the room. "They know not to come in here while I'm conditioning."

You glanced around, noticing the projector screen on the far wall for the first time. It finally dawned on you that this was one of his infamous rooms where he had taken so many people from your friends. Where he had taken family from your fellow Whitetails. A feeling a nausea swept over you. 

"Can we go somewhere else?" you asked him between kisses. 

Jacob pulled back and studied your face, unsure what he had done wrong. When he noticed the uneasy expression on your face as you stared at the chair in the middle of the room, he realized what it was reminding you of. Inside, something tugged at him - an uncertainty, knowing you saw him as a monster to some degree. 

"We don't have to," he said quietly, turning his gaze back to you. 

"I want to. I want... you," you assured him, touching the burns on his cheek. "I just.."

"I know," Jacob said and started to pick up the clothes that had been tossed so carelessly. "I'll have to cuff you to bring you upstairs."

\---

After being led through the halls and up the stairs, playing the part of captive when you encountered anyone along your walk, you finally arrived to the top floor. Jacob assured you no one used this floor but him and that you wouldn't be disturbed. 

He removed your cuffs and pushed open a door at the end of the hall to reveal a large bedroom with a neatly made bed. Everything on the dresser was meticulously placed and organized. It didn't look like anyone had lived in it. 

"I sleep in my office," he answered from behind you, reading your thoughts. 

"Why?"

"I don't sleep much," he said casually and closed the door quietly behind you. He reached his arms around your waist and nuzzled his face to your neck, breathing you in. 

"I want to know everything about you," you told him. The thought had struck you randomly along the way down the hall, realizing he was still a stranger to you even though you had given yourself to him. 

"Whatever you want to know," he agreed but decided to add in, "After."

The frustration Jacob had felt since you arrived was mounting and he was unsure how much longer he could hold back. All he wanted was you beneath him again - to smell the trees on your hair and the clean scent of your skin. He wanted that moment when you had wrapped your limbs around him and held him tighter than you should have. 

His hands moved up your body, pulling your shirt along with them until it was over your head. Without hesitation, his hands moved to your jeans, unbuttoning them and pulling them down your legs before turning you around in his arms to inspect you.

"How you get me so damn wet without even trying is a mystery to me," you told him before pushing up on your tip toes to kiss him again. 

Jacob smiled against your lips and pulled you up into his arms, letting you wrap your legs around his waist as he brought you over to the bed he had never actually laid in.


	11. Chapter 11

"You can't come back here again," Jacob told you as you laid in his arms. "I'll let you go in the morning and say you're under my control and that I'm waiting for you to lead me to the Militia. They'll buy it, but not if you hang around in these woods."

"How will I see you then?" 

"I'll come to you. Before you go, I'll give you a programmed radio you can reach me at too. I'm serious though... promise me you'll behave."

"Ugh, you're no fun," you teased, rolling to your stomach and resting on your elbows so you could see him. His expression was grave. You realized now wasn't the time to annoy him. "I promise, Jacob."

"Good," he sighed and stared up at the ceiling, collecting his thoughts. He was sure his plan would work - you weren't the first he let go, only to control at a distance. The troops wouldn't question it. He hoped. It was his duty now to protect you. "What do you want to know?"

"Hmm?" you asked, glancing over again from the pillow you had been watching.

"You said earlier that you wanted to know about me. What is you want to know?"

"Just... everything. Not the heavy stuff, I know a lot from the book," you told him. Jacob raised his eyebrows at you, surprised you had read it. "I want to know the everyday things. Favorite colour and food and movie? What do you do around here when you're not, you know..."

"Inquisitive one," he smirked. "Uh... I walk around the woods. Hunt. I don't cook but I like anything gamey. Red. Does porn count?"

"Yes, but not the ones with the shitty acting."

"Well fuck.. I suppose any horror movie then."

You sat up, wrapping your blanket around your body as you did. Jacob laid still, eyes on you the whole time. He nodded at you, indicating it was your turn. 

"Comedies, but the ones with dry humour... and horror too. Green. I hunt, but I guess you knew that. I write a lot and I quite enjoy spying on your people as they do stupid shit. Once, two of them fucked outside my cabin without realizing it was occupied I guess."

"They what?" 

"Yeah... it was.. awkward to say the least."

"You watched?"

"Well, yeah. Wouldn't you?"

"Naughty girl," he murmured with a grin.

You laid back down and nestled into the crook of his arm again, tracing the scars on his chest. You couldn't explain it but things seemed easier when you were both silent. Words weren't always necessary for you; you could read one another through motions. 

Soon, you felt yourself growing drowsy and the light in the room started to dim as your eyelids shut under their own weight. 

\---

When you woke, all light had escaped the room except for a tiny bit of moonlight from the nearby window. You blinked and listened again for the noise that had woken you, only to realize it was Jacob. He was curled up into himself, facing the opposite direction. His body shook so violently, you could feel the mattress quiver beneath you. 

"Jake?" you whispered, unsure if he was awake. 

He replied only with a deep sob that rocked through his body. His words were indistinguishable but you knew he was in the depths of a nightmare. 

You wrapped your arms around his waist in hopes to expel any distance between you. 

"Shhh, it's okay," you whispered to him, hoping to break through to him somehow. You weren't sure if you should wake him or if that would make things worse. "I'm here. It's okay."

His body twitched and pulled against your arms but you held tighter, still soothing him with your words. 

Somewhere in the cloud of his mind, Jacob heard your voice. His eyes flew open and he pushed back at the mattress, unsure of his surroundings. 

"It's just me. It's me..."

Jacob glanced over his shoulder to see your face resting on his shoulder. It took him a minute to realize you were real but when he did, his body relaxed slightly, knowing he had escaped another dream. 

"You're here," Jacob muttered, knowing you were but needing to say it out loud to make it real. 

"I'm right here. It's okay," you whispered against his skin. His back was now moist with sweat but you didn't push away. You clung to him with every inch of your body, wanting him to know he wasn't alone. 

Jacob eased back against the mattress, bringing his hands over yours as you rested back against his shoulder. He knew he wouldn't fall back to sleep after that but he refused to let you go in this moment. The touch of your skin on his was everything he needed.


	12. Chapter 12

"Run. As soon as the doors open, run for home and don't look back," Jacob instructed. 

"And I'm just supposed to run by the guards?"

"I've briefed them already," he explained. "While you were asleep. They think I'm allowing you to leave temporarily."

"Hmm, all figured out then, huh Red? You're more than just a handsome face," you smirked as you put on your second boot and stood, now dressed. "Guess I'll see ya, when I see ya."

"It won't be long," he rasped in that fucking delicious voice of his. You knew you had to leave soon or it would grow too hard to do so. 

"We'll see," you said and kissed him on the cheek before you approached the door. "Don't go do something stupid like getting killed while I'm gone."

"You too pup," Jacob said flatly. He watched as you left the room hurriedly, feeling your absence already weighing on him. 

\---

You finally saw the cabin up ahead, satisfied that Jacob's plan had gone off without a hitch. You ran like a mad woman out of the Veteran's Center and the entire way home, even when you felt like you your lungs were set on fire. Now that your home was in sight, you finally slowed and gulped at the clear mountain air. 

"(Y/n)!" Eli called. You glanced up to see him stepping off of your deck and running towards you. "(Y/n), what happened?" 

"Ah fuck..." You muttered below your breath as you eased towards him. "I'm okay."

"Where have you been? It's been two days since any of us could get ahold of you."

You thought about that for a minute, feeling an uneasy. There were days, sometimes even a week, where they didn't hear from you, but they never tried tracking you down. Now Eli was here on your doorstep. You knew you couldn't pretend like nothing had happened. 

"Jacob fucking Seed... I got out but, Eli... I dunno if they tailed me."

"He had you? Did he use that damn music box?" Eli asked, holding onto your shoulders. "Look at me!"

"Eli, it's okay. He didn't get the chance."

He stood back and released the grip on you. He shook his head slightly and glanced back to the cabin and then to you. 

"You can't stay here. Too dangerous. I'll help you pack and we'll head back to the Wolf's Den."

"Oh, no.. no, I'll be okay," you tried assuring him. You didn't want to give up your home or your freedom you had there. You needed that now more than ever. 

"Girl, it's not safe here. You'll be hunted down," he told you. You knew under normal circumstances that he was right. You sighed and nodded, knowing there was no way to get out of this without telling him the truth. 

He led you to the cabin with you following behind, running your fingers along the outline of the radio in your back pocket - the one Jacob had given you. You knew it would be your only means of communicating with him going forward.


	13. Chapter 13

Two days were long enough, Jacob decided as he hiked up the path to the back of your cabin. He hadn't heard from you over the radio and now he was left with a mixture of feelings; all anxious. He worried you had been hurt. Then he worried you might not want to speak with him after having time to reflect. He even internally accused you of using him to get closer, for the Whitetails sake. It took him awhile to shake the last thought, finally determined that he could read you well enough to know you wouldn't do that. 

As he knocked on the door, he peered around, ensuring he hadn't been followed. He noticed your car on the main road but his knocks remained unanswered. 

Jacob pulled out his radio. He knew you must be close - hunting maybe. 

"Pup? You close by?"

He waited a minute before your whispered voice returned to him, "I can't talk. They've got me living in the bunker. I managed to slip away but they're watching me... I think they... I don't know what's going on but I can't leave without raising a flag."

Jacob swore to himself internally but remained calm for your sake, "Do what you have to."

"I have the radio hidden in my room but just wait for me to reach out, okay? I don't know when I'll have a chance but..."

"Take a breath," he instructed. He could tell you were starting to lose the cool exterior you normally wore. "Call me when you can."

He stared at your front door, still half expecting you to open it and pull him inside. He sighed and turned back to the path, knowing you were right; the Whitetails suspected something. 

\---

"(Y/n)?" you heard Tammy call in through your bedroom door as she knocked loudly. 

"Fuck," you cursed quietly. It had only been a half an hour since Wheaty had come to check on you. They apparently had a rotation going. 

You tucked your radio under the mattress and hurried to the door. "Everything okay?"

"Just wanted to check in. I've been so damn busy I haven't had a chance to see you since you got in. Do ya mind?" she asked, nodding to the chair on the other side of your bedroom. You stepped aside and let her take a seat before you closed the door and sat on the bed opposite of her. "You feeling alright after everything?"

"It's fine... I'm fine. I got out before anything happened. I mean, I'd be lying if I said I wasn't shaken but, I'll live."

"Mmm," she hummed, leaning over her knees. "I've seen first hand what Jacob can do to the people he has in his chair. You're lucky."

"I'd say," you said, trying your best to maintain eye contact. Tammy basically made a career of torturing people for information. You knew she'd spot a lie from a mile away. 

"Strange though," she said a bit too casually, "I've never heard of anyone just breaking free. How did you manage it?"

You straightened, still looking in her direction. You knew the story inside and out now - enough people had asked you already. You just had to rehearse it one more time. 

"Hunting knife in my boot. I tucked it into the back, along my heel. Those peggies are cocky bastards if nothing else... one came in to rough me up when I was tied to the chair. He just happened to get close enough for me to stab and then cut my way out. I grabbed his gun and ran like hell after that."

"Shit, little girl. You've got some balls, dontcha?" she chuckled. "How about Big Bad. See him while you were there?"

"Yeah, those Seeds wouldn't miss their opportunity to put on a show, now would they? I saw him out back, before they took me from the cage. He didn't come into the room though... guess I got out before he had a chance."

"Fucking lucky. Man's a lunatic. They all are, but Jacob... he can get into your head and make you do all sorts of things. Things you normally wouldn't do. He'll make you turn on family, friends... He's dangerous," she said. Tammy stood and wiped her hands down the front of her jeans. "Well listen, I won't keep ya. I'm sure you're still catching up on sleep."

"Thanks for checking in. Means a lot," you told her. 

"No problem, kid," she smiled. Before she left the room, she stood and placed a hand on the doorframe, glancing over her shoulder. "Can I grab you something to eat?"

"I'm good, thanks."

"K. Figured I'd ask. Jacob's known to starve people from what I hear. Strange though... he normally does for a week or so before he puts anyone in the chair. Not with you though. You're lucky."

You watched Tammy leave as the knot in your stomach grew and contorted, almost making you sick. You replayed her words, picking apart the subtle hints she had thrown in. You weren't sure if she knew something was off or if you were being paranoid but in that moment, you knew you'd have to be more careful than ever before. If the Whitetails knew you were cozying up with the enemy, you'd both be in trouble.


	14. Chapter 14

"I just want to run back to grab some books," you assured Eli after he voiced his concern with you going home. 

"What if you're followed? Seed won't like the fact that you escaped; he'll have his hunters looking for you."

"I can't just live underground for the rest of my life. I'm starting to go stir crazy. It's been a week and a half since I've seen daylight!" you argued. You sighed and lowered your voice, deciding to switch tactics. "Eli, please. You know what my freedom means to me. It's the reason I don't live here full-time. I feel like a prisoner."

He groaned and threw his head back, running a hand over his forehead. You watched as he closed his eyes and remained still for a long moment. Finally he opened his eyes again and nodded, "Fine, but take your radio. If you suspect anything, call for us."

"I will, I promise," you said happily. "I'll be back before sundown."

You took off before he had the chance to change his mind, racing down the hall towards the entrance. Eli looked over at Wheaty who had been sifting through his records in the corner.

"Follow her for me," he asked. "I need to be sure, before Tammy ends up doing something she'll regret."

\---

Along the drive home, you noticed a quad just off the shoulder of the road - always far enough back to conceal the driver but always following. You knew immediately what was happening and whatever emotion you should have been feeling in that moment, was overcome with a surge of anger. Your friends didn't trust you and yes, that was your fault, but it still stung like a bitch. 

Not only that but now your plans to radio Jacob were thrown out the window. You were sure whoever was following, would tail you to the cabin and back again. This trip was already wasted for you. 

When you threw your borrowed car into park and slammed the door behind you, you didn't even look back to see if the quad was close. You were so blinded by hurt and rage that you stormed up the hill without a second glance, nearing the house in a cloud of emotions until you noticed something. A small wooden box on the step leading to your front door. You bent down, bringing it to you as you ran your fingers over the plain wood. It was small enough to fit in one hand and vaguely familiar but still a curiosity you needed to break open. 

Before you did, you went inside; away from any prying eyes. When the door was shut and locked, you opened it to behold the most beautiful ring you had ever seen. It was a thin band carved from wood and smoothed down to a glossy surface. On the underside, the same leaves you watched float from the trees in the surrounding forest had been carved into it delicately.

You let your thumb trace over the details, knowing exactly where it had come from. You could see him behind your eyelids - carving into it with steady hands with his red handled hunting knife. 

You closed your eyes and leaned your head back on the door, trying to force the tears away that were threatening you. You had gotten yourself into a mess and it was one you didn't know how to escape. Torn and pulled in all directions, not able to let go of either side. The feeling of helplessness was starting to weigh heavy on your shoulders.


	15. Chapter 15

"Jacob? You awake?" you whispered into the radio. It was almost 3:00 am and you were sure everyone in the Den had gone to bed hours ago. Still, after being followed earlier today, you couldn't chance it. 

"(Y/n)," he whispered back. "Hold on."

You waited a few minutes for him to come back. When he did, his voice was louder, "How's my girl?" 

His voice stirred your emotions and you clung to your composure as you answered, "Do you remember where you caught up with me when I was going to blow up your beacon?"

"Are you threatening to try again?"

"Meet me there. I'm heading out now."

"On my way," he said quickly and grabbed his jacket as he threw his office door open and headed down the hall. 

\---

"There you are, darlin," Jacob said from behind you as he closed in and put his hands on your hips. You hadn't heard him approach but it didn't come as a surprise to you. 

Turning quickly, you pushed between his arms and held onto him tightly. It had been nearly two weeks since you had spoken and with the Whitetails acting suspicious of you lately, he was really the only person you felt at ease with anymore. 

"Whoa," he said into your hair. "What is it?"

"They know. I don't know how... I've covered my tracks but they still..." you tilted your face to his. "What do I do?"

"Stay calm. I'll keep my distance and they'll back off."

"That's it though... I don't want you to," you told him, defeated. You pulled away and let your eyes drop to the ground. "I'm so torn, Jacob."

He watched you as the struggle within you surfaced and threatened to bubble over. If only you hadn't been one of them; his enemy. Life would be so much easier if you would just give yourself to him fully. He could protect you and do so openly rather than sneak around in the middle of the night.

You sighed and touched the ring you had placed on your right ring finger, tracing the smooth lines like you had done at least a hundred times today. 

"This is the kindest thing anyone has ever done for me," you told him honestly. "It's so beautiful."

"I had a good inspiration," he said, closing the distance between you. His hand moved to your hair, brushing it from your forehead. 

You straightened and leaned up into him, kissing his rough lips. 

The way he kissed you... the way he cared for you even, was like no one else ever had. Even though everything in his exterior and all the horror stories about him should say otherwise, something inside screamed to you to give in and leave your life behind.

"I've missed you," you told him when he let up for a bit of air. 

"Fuck, me too," he growled and started pulling at your sweatpants, letting them drop to the ground beneath you. His fingers were immediately teasing you as he let feather light touches graze between your legs. "All I've wanted is this."

You couldn't help but grin at his confession and when you brought your hands to his pants to do the same, you felt his desire peaking against them. He let out a low groan as you palmed at him through the fabric. Before you were able to reach for the zipper, he dropped to his knees in front of you, replacing his fingers with his mouth. 

Your moans echoed through the quiet forest as his tongue circled your clit quickly. Your hips bucked against him but he held you still by placing his hands on your hips and digging his fingertips into the flesh. 

"S-slow down, Red," you panted, not wanting to cum so quickly. 

He glanced up at you - eyes still blue as the sea, even in the moonlight - and shook his head. A smile crept to his face as he quickened this pace again, forcing you to lean your head back and squeeze your eyes shut as you found your release against his lips. 

His pace slowed as he eased his grip and let you relax. When your body stopped shaking and was yours again, he stood and kissed you deeply. 

"Turn for me, sweetheart," he whispered as he undid his jeans and holster and let them fall to his ankles. You gave him a quick devious smile but did as he asked and turned, pressing against the large trunk of a spruce behind you. 

Jacob let his gaze linger as he took in the curves of your body, illuminated by the night sky. You were by far the most beautiful thing he had ever seen; both inside and out. You were his alpha, he was never more sure of anything in his life. 

He knew he had to find some way to break you down and let you see the benefits of joining him, but now wasn't the time. The only thing that mattered now was being whole with you again. 

Jacob let his fingers graze your sides and down to your hips again where he held firmly as he entered you from behind; the gasp you let out almost sending him over the edge already. 

"Oh God," you moaned as he thrust into your roughly. His cock rubbed along your now overly sensitive walls slowly, building you back up for more. 

You rocked against him, meeting his strokes as he inched in deeper. Jacob groaned as you took him completely and threw his hands from your hips and up your body to cup your breasts that were being scratched by the bark of the tree you clung to. When he kneaded at your skin roughly, you let out another moan, sending him over the edge. 

"Jake," you panted as you peeked with him, throwing yourself back against his chest as he held you. Your bodies shuddered together in unison as you both came. 

Jacob let his hands roam down to your waist as he pressed his cheek to the top of your head, letting you both relax.

"I don't know when I'll see you again," you said sadly. It had hit you like a ton of bricks, just having him hold you like he was. You wanted nothing more than to stay with him in these woods, away from everything, but you knew that would never be your reality. 

"I'll come to you whenever you radio me. Doesn't matter when it is," he said as he released you and pulled his clothes back on. You did the same before you turned to him. "This war won't last forever."

"No.. then we'll all end up in a bunker for seven years and you'll find some good looking chick to cozy up to instead," you said, trying to lighten the mood. Your voice came out weak and cracked instead. 

"I'd wait for you," he smiled and kissed the top of your head. "Unless of course, you change your mind and come to my bunker beforehand?"

"Red..."

"Stubborn girl," he sighed and kissed you again, holding you so tight the air escaped your lungs.


	16. Chapter 16

Another week went by without Jacob seeing you again. He found himself growing more frustrated by the day and sleep was nonexistent at that point for him. He fought internally every night after he turned off his radio from talking to you, to not force you to give your location and storm in there himself and kidnap you. Tonight was no different. 

"When are they going to let you out of that hellhole?" he asked. 

"When they're positive you're no longer a threat to me I guess. I'm honestly getting ready to just say fuck it and leave," you corrected yourself quickly, knowing he'd be asking again. "To my home... not to St. Francis."

"You're miserable. Stop being a stubborn pup and come home to me."

"Jake, I can't..."

"Fuck, I know, I know," he snapped back, showing impatience for the first time since you met him. When he spoke again, he was calm again. "Can you get away?"

You smiled before pressing down on the button again, already knowing the answer. "Getting a little sexually frustrated, are we Red?"

"Am I the only one?" 

"No," you admitted. "They're working a new shift with the few guards on the doors now. Used to not have any but there's two now. I can't sneak out."

Jacob swore to himself and stared off at the map on his desk. He looked over the faces of the Whitetails he had pinned at the side. Before he met you, it was only war to him. They were the enemy because Joseph told him so but he had no ill feelings. It was only a job. 

Now, he hated them for keeping you apart. 

"I'll come up with something. Some way to convince them I don't want you."

You faked a loud gasp into the radio, "I'm hurt."

"You know that's not what I meant," he sighed. "You know I want you... in every possible position."

Your breath caught, envisioning him holding you against some tree, fucking you from behind as he moaned against your neck. "Fuck, you can't talk like that."

"C'mere and I'll bury my face in that sweet pussy of yours. Put you out of your misery."

"I'm going to bed. I'll leave you with that thought," you told him, knowing you'd have to find some way out of the bunker if he kept talking. 

"Don't you dare..." 

The radio went silent on your end, leaving Jacob alone again with his thoughts. He groaned and tossed the radio to the desk in front of him and slumped over it, wracking his brain for some way to have you with him again. 

\---

"Morning!" Tammy called from the other side of the kitchen when you walked in the next morning. 

You hadn't slept well again and unconsciously found yourself searching for coffee. 

"Coffee?" 

"Oh my God, yes. Please."

"Didn't sleep again, huh?" Tammy asked as she waved a hand for you to sit at the table while she poured you a cup. She brought a second cup over for her and placed them both down in front of you as she sat too. 

"I don't know what's going on lately but I can't sleep. I think I just miss being home," you said, throwing another hint out there that you'd like to leave. 

"I know, but it's too dangerous," she said before lowering her voice and peeking over your shoulder and into the hall. "Listen, it'll all be over soon. I'm not supposed to tell anyone but we're coming for Jacob. We know where he'll be and everything."

"You're storming the Vet Center? It's a fucking fortress."

"No, no," she shook her head and waved her hand out in front of her. "Joseph's planning a special church service; heard it on the Peggie radio. All the Seeds will be there. We know the direction he'll be headed and the time... Just gotta lay low and bomb the hell out of his truck as he goes by."

"He'll have backup though with him, won't he? I mean, that family's known for taking precautions. He'll have guards."

"Maybe so," Tammy agreed, leaning back with a smile. "If they give us a fight, then so be it but with Big Bad Seed dead, I'm sure they'll cave pretty quick."

_Dead_

The thought rang through your mind, almost making you sick. All you could think of in that moment was warning Jacob. You had to do whatever you could, even if that meant going against your allies. 

"Hun?" Tammy asked, leaning down to where you were staring off. 

"I just... I'll be so thankful when this is over. I can't believe we'll finally have our shot."

"Crazy, huh? Fucking nightmare will be done."

You took a long sip of your coffee and stood to dump the rest down the sink, unable to drink anymore. 

"Ugh, gotta pee. I'll see ya later, k?" you called over your shoulder.

Tammy nodded and flashed you a smile. When you were out of earshot, she brought the mug to her lips again, whispering into the dark liquid, "Bingo."


	17. Chapter 17

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Quick little chapter. More coming tomorrow! Only two more chapters left.

"Jacob, for fuck's sake... where are you?" you whispered into the radio again. This was the third time you had tried reaching him in the last half hour. 

"Pup, what is it? Are you okay?"

"Where the hell have you been?" you hissed, frantic at this point. 

"Working," he said simply, not wanting to tell you the truth but knowing you already knew all the gritty details. "What's going on?"

"They're going to kill you. They have a fucking plan, Jake!"

"Okay.. calm down. Who?"

"The Whitetails," you told him, finally taking in a deep breath. "Does Joseph have a church service planned soon?"

"How did you know that?" 

"Answer me," you shot back, impatient that he was asking so many questions. 

"Tomorrow at noon," he answered. The tone in your voice was throwing him off. It was desperate and anxious in a way he hadn't heard before. 

"They're going to bomb your truck. You can't go. Please."

"I have to. Joseph needs me there."

"Fuck Joseph! You won't do him any good if you're dead," you whisper screamed into the radio. You couldn't stress enough to him the severity of the situation. "Don't you fucking leave me like this, Jacob. Not when I need you."

"If you did, then you would have left already," he said back as calmly as he could. His insecurities about the situation had been mounting the longer you had been apart and as much as he knew they were nothing but anxiety ridden worries, he couldn't push them from his mind. "I have to get back. I'll take care of this."

"Jacob, please... I'm begging you. Please, don't do this..." you listened for his response but he never returned. You threw the radio against the far wall, shattering it to useless pieces. He was making you chose, that was obvious. Now all you had to do was make your choice.


	18. Chapter 18

"You need to stay put," Eli told you. You had been protesting his wishes for a good ten minutes now, pleading to help them with their mission.

"If you're going to bomb him, it won't matter if I'm there, now will it?" 

"It could. I won't take that chance," he said again. "You're like a sister to me. I'd never forgive myself if something happened. Now please... just do this for me."

You groaned and nodded, knowing he would never give in. He smiled and patted your shoulder as he left, bringing a half dozen Whitetails with him. 

You watched helplessly as they made their way to the meeting spot - the spot where they planned to kill Jacob. 

\---

You waited a few minutes for rest of the Militia to fan out in the bunker, preoccupied with their chatter about the plans for finally hunting down their enemy. When they were distracted, you grabbed a spare rifle from the weapon rack in the hallway and ran outside, grabbing the nearest quad and heading to the place you knew they'd be. 

Since you had broken your radio, it was impossible to check in with Jacob again so you had to assume he was still planning on going to Joseph's service today and thus, putting himself in danger. You weren't sure what your plan was but you refused to sit back while he was out in harm's way. 

When you approached the site Tammy had pointed out to you on the map last night while she bragged again about their plans, you killed the engine to the quad and continued on foot. Sure enough, when you approached, you saw the group scattered in the brush below the hilltop where you stood. You watched each one carefully, looking for cues as to who held the grenades. It wasn't until you heard the rumble of the engines and saw the flash if white trucks approach in the distance that you noticed Tammy reach for the bag at her feet. She pointed to the trucks, to a wide eyed Eli who watched with his mouth gaping. 

"I'm doing it," you heard her call, catching her voice on the wind. Eli shook his head, still hidden from the road but Tammy nodded vigorously, fishing out a grenade. 

Her slender fingers reached for the pin as you ran full tilt down the hill and lunged at her back, knocking her flat to the ground. You both struggled as she rolled beneath you and finally moved to her back, still pinned. Her eyes shot wide when she saw you, holding her still. 

"Traitor! You're going to kill us all!" she howled beneath you. 

You held a hand over her mouth as the trucks rolled by - four in total, all with Jacob's people piled in the back. You searched the faces from your hiding spot until you saw Jacob in the last truck, driving alone. Of course he wouldn't risk his soldiers lives, you thought. 

Tammy fought against you again, snapping you from your daze. When the trucks rounded the bend and headed out of sight, you released her and pushed up from the ground. She sprang up and swung for you, missing by an inch. 

"Tammy, no!" Eli bellowed as he grabbed at her from behind. "Stop."

"She's a traitor, Eli! Jacob's fucking whore. I told you!" she spat as she fought against him. 

"All of you... back home. Now," Eli ordered. He turned to you and stared intensely as the others left, shaking their heads at you or muttering their disapproval. Tammy was the last to leave, glaring in your direction. 

"I would never turn on you," you pleaded after her. When she didn't turn back, you looked to Eli who had a saddened expression. "I promise I haven't told him anything. I would never do that."

"What is it then?"

"I... I can't even explain to you how it happened. None of it makes sense. I just can't help myself."

"You care about him?"

"Yes," you said quietly, lowering your eyes. 

He placed a hand on your shoulder - always the understanding one. "You know I can't allow you to come back, but I refuse to make you an enemy, not when you've been loyal to us. You're my family." 

You felt the hot sting of tears make their way to your eyes, ashamed at yourself and what this was doing to him. "I'm so sorry."

"We weren't going to kill your boy," he said. "Not cause I don't want to, don't mistaken that, but because we're outnumbered. If we took the shot, every hunter that's hidden in these forests would be breathing down our necks. This was for you. A test."

You looked to him, shocked at his confession. All of this was because they didn't trust you. You wished they had come to you before to talk but really, would it have made a difference?

"I love you, and I know I don't deserve it back for what I've done to you. I just hope someday you can believe that I was never going to turn on you. He knows that and has never asked me to."

"I know," he said.

"Good bye Eli," you said quietly. He nodded and turned, leaving you alone with nowhere to turn.


	19. Chapter 19

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Last chapter! Thanks for all the comments! (I say it everytime but they're honestly the whole reason I write these stories. I love getting to know you all a little better) And thanks again to Scarlett for the inspiration. ♥️

The next few days were a blur. For the most part, you stayed in your cabin (usually in bed) and grieved for the family you had just lost. Your emotions wavered between sadness and anger but had finally relaxed to a numbness as you pushed everything down to the deepest pits of your mind. 

Everyday, you expected one of the Whitetails to show up to kill you and checked the window at any little noise from outside. Each time, you were met with the same emptiness that filled the air around your home but today when you heard a crunch of footsteps, you peeked out to finally see someone. 

His stance was casual as he strolled up the clearing, as if he had done so a hundred times. When his eyes met yours, he quickened his pace and met you at the door as you threw it open and ran to him. 

"I wasn't sure you'd be here," Jacob said as he held you to him. "Where have you been?"

"I'm out. I stopped them from attacking your truck and now they know," you said flatly. You wanted to cry but you had no more tears left. "Why couldn't you just stay away?"

"If I did, they would have known you tipped me off. I couldn't chance anything happening to you."

You rested your cheek against his chest as you let that sink in. He had risked his life just to ensure your secret was kept. 

"You idiot," you said, pushing at him. "You could have died."

"So could you," he shot back. Jacob was grateful you had saved his life but the cost could have been much greater. That was something he would never forgive himself for. 

You sighed and pushed your ring around on your hand, distracting yourself from his watchful eyes. "I don't know what to do with myself now."

Jacob saw the pain on your face and knew he couldn't leave you here on your own. He knew his offer would be refused again but he couldn't leave without saying it again. 

"You don't need to stay here. You could come..."

"Even though I'm not one of them now, doesn't mean I'd join the Project. I can't give them up, or any info on them. I could never hurt them."

"You don't have to. No strings..." You looked up to him, questioning him silently. Jacob nodded before he spoke again, "Come home with me."

You held him again, knowing he was giving himself to you now fully; as a human, not as a Herald of Eden's Gate. You let your fingers trace along his back, whispering into his jacket, "Yes."


End file.
